Diamonds. Girls do some crazy things for them. I mean, I get it. I am actually a little jealous of some of their tenacity. I, too, love them and sometimes wish I had the moral deficiencies to play with an old, rich man’s ding dong for 10 carats. Seriously. I admire the girl who can do it. Anna Nicole will forever be my favorite geriatric loving lady. Of course, not every girl has to tea bag your grandpa to get a beautiful diamond. I have a fascination with diamonds. I know I am not alone here. Since childhood, if it sparkled I wanted it. If it sparkled and was big, I wanted it even more. Not much has changed since then. There is nothing, NOTHING in this world I would rather receive as a gift from a lover more than diamonds. I am no Elizabeth Taylor but I sure have acquired some beauties in my day. So what does that matter and why should you care? Girls. It matters because I know diamonds and what I know will help you and your diamond buying lover.
Here is a little lesson in diamonds. The Nicole Edition.
D through H is what you want. I through J is when you send the fiancè back for a better stone color unless you want to spend every single day obsessing over the slightly yellow tone of your stone. I promise you this will happen. K through Z is when you break up with ’em. Kick ’em to the curb because that is not a nice thing for someone to do to you! If you fancy fancy colored diamonds, right on! I think they are frigging knock out! Get yourself a fancy colored diamond! White diamonds should not possess any color, though. This is the one thing I will not settle for. That and a jerk man in my life.
You want to be wearing a rock that is essentially not a rock but a sparkling diamond. If getting a smaller stone means getting a better stone then get the smaller stone for crying out loud. I will talk more about this philosophy later. When is comes to inclusions, you do not want to see them with the naked eye. Ideally you don’t want to have any but no/less inclusions means more money. It is very possible, though, to find stones who have the perfect little inclusions hidden in just the right places. Inclusions aren’t just undesirable because they look bad, they can actually impair diamonds from sparkling to their potential shine. Look at it like this. There is this vivacious, lovely girl with a zest for life and a love for laughing and she is with this dud of a guy who constantly tries to kill her spirit. He stands in the way of her shine, dulls her sparkle. He is an inclusion. You don’t want him or inclusions. Got it? Good. What is an inclusion? In Laymen’s terms, inclusions are birth marks. What is a loupe? A teeny tiny little magnifying glass used to view a diamond. What is a facet? Facets are flat surfaces on geometric shapes. These flat cuts, facets, are what give diamonds their brilliance.
Diamond shape is simply a matter of preference. Unlike color and clarity, there is no guide telling you which shape is prettier than the other. You get to choose this one. However, once you pick the shape, not all cuts are created equally. For example. The oval. Some are too fat, some too thin, too long, too deep. Deep? Yes! This goes for all stones. Depth matters. You do not want a ton of the carat weight to be wasted in the depth. You also don’t want too much carat weight in the face of the stone causing it to be too shallow. The depth of the stone can make a stone dull. It will effect the sparkle. The depth of the stone determines light reflection. Just remember this term, ideal cut. That is what you want. An ideal cut stone.
Do I have a favorite shape? You bet your cojones I do. Do I have a least favorite? Yep. Sure do. Would I send a man back to the jeweler for a different stone if I didn’t like the shape? Honey, he never would have come home with that nonsense because I make sure he knows before he goes. In my opinion, there are two stones superior to all the others. The round and the emerald cut. There is nothing more beautiful than a 3 carat round diamond with exceptional color and clarity, other than a 5 carat emerald cut with exceptional color and clarity, of course. Next in line? The asscher cut. Beaut. I. Ful. Then? Cushion and pear. Here is the thing about the pear, though. Bigger is better. And it cannot be too thin. It has to have a little girth. My best friend has a killer pear shape. It is large and in charge, colorless and I can’t see an inclusion to save my life. She done good for herself. Truth is, any shape diamond can be exceptionally stunning as long as the color, clarity, and cut are where they are supposed to be. I have seen my favorite cut, a ginormous round cut diamond, that looked like a dull piece of sea glass on a platinum band. I have also been stopped in my tracks by my least favorite shaped stones due to their brilliance. A good diamond is a good diamond. When it comes to the preferred shape, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Another important thing to remember about the diamond shape. The less facets the diamond has the easier it is to see an inclusion with the naked eye. Look at the emerald cut. It has the least amount of facets. You better make sure that thing is clear as hell unless you want Bitchy Betty pointing it out at the town luncheon. The emerald cut and the asscher require the best clarity, in my opinion, due to having the least amount of facets. Remember. If you are buying a diamond with inclusions make sure they are hidden. Try thinking about it like this. You are the inclusion and the facets are the trees. It is hard to hide in an open field but pretty easy to hide in a forest. Get it?
Some shapes appear to look larger or smaller than other shapes of the same carat weight.
Carat: Quality over Quantity
This is a hard one for some girls to swallow but please, please, accept my advice on this one. Quality over quantity. I know, I know. The 5 carat stone is so what you want. If your budget allows for you to get a 5 carat stone with ideal color, clarity, and cut then get that 5 carat and give your man a rusty trombone! However, if your budget allows for an ideal 1.5 carat possessing perfect color, clarity, and cut or a kaka 3 carat, get the 1.5 carat. Trust me. I have been there. I wore a 4.5 carat radiant cut diamond surrounded by 4 carats of baguettes on a platinum band. I was 23 years old sporting 8 carats of diamonds. Nuts. I was young and I wanted BIG and my first husband loved me like no other and wanted to give me everything I wanted. Sweet guy. Fast forward to the next one. Quality wasn’t up for discussion. My second husband was quite particular and less flashy than the first. He educated himself, looked, shopped, researched, bought, returned, and then gave. He gave me extraordinary stones. Colorless, ideal cut, VVS1. I got a 2 carat round center with 2, 1 carat round side stones all possessing the same quality. I had a choice to get a substantially larger center stone if I wanted to sacrifice my 2 carats of side stones. I opted for the classic 3 stone engagement ring and she was a real stunner. Is it bad that I was kind of thinking ahead on this one? Like… hmmmm. what if this one doesn’t work out? If I go for the 3 stone engagement ring then I could potentially end up with a pair of diamond studs and a gorgeous diamond pendant. Guess what? It didn’t work out and now I have beautiful diamonds studs and a DDG diamond pendant. Did I love my 8 carat diamond engagement ring? Yes. But for the cost of the stone I could have gotten a much more beautiful, smaller diamond had I chosen quality over quantity.
The Diamond Rules
When it comes to color DO NOT COMPROMISE. Remember, white diamonds are supposed to be white.
Quality over quantity.
Make sure you have a better man on your arm than ring on your finger.
If you don’t like it, change it. March your cute little butt into your jeweler and get what you love!
If you want bigger but can’t afford it, you can always upgrade at anniversary time or find a new fiance. .
If you like it, get it. Don’t listen to what anyone says. You will be looking at that thing for a long ass time.
Insure your stones.
Diamonds should sparkle even in the dark! Ideal cut is where it’s at.
If the diamond outlives the marriage, reset it and wear it proudly. You worked hard for that thing!
If someone proposes to you with a ring inside of a red Cartier box, don’t be dumb. Say yes.
Classic is always good.
If you happen to fall in love with a cheap SOB who can totally afford a gorgeous stone but opts for a teeny tiny little thing, remember, you deserve the stunning stone. If he doesn’t seem to agree then maybe he doesn’t deserve you.
Make sure he knows before he goes.
A Message From A Girl Who Knows All About This
The brilliance and beauty of true love sparkles brighter and lasts longer than any diamond ever will. I have seen it and it is simply beautiful. No diamond will ever make you fall in true love, make an unhappy marriage happier, a lousy husband a good one, or a miserable wife better. Be true to yourself and your heart. You deserve to love. You deserve to be loved and holy crap you deserve to be spoiled with diamonds! Don’t sell yourself out for a shiny rock, though. If he’s not the right one and you know it, don’t do it. Even if he did give you a Cartier.
I will, of course, be adding to my collection of diamonds, not husbands;)
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