Does your significant other show you love by wanting to spend tons of quality time with you and gets hurt feelings if you need your time alone? Do you need to hear how lovely and wonderful you are or how beautiful you look but your significant other never tells you the things you need to hear? Sugar, your lover ain’t speaking your love language. But have no fear! Love languages can be learned! Do you even know what I am talking about? Shit. Listen up. This is some good stuff.
There are 5 love languages:
Words of Affirmation
Acts of Service
Every last one of us has our own love language. One of the five listed above. We show love and receive love by using these love languages. Something interesting about love languages… we all tend to express love using the love language we need in order to feel loved and be fulfilled. It is so frigging interesting. And once you realize how all this jazz works your eyes are going to pop wide open and you are going to learn how to love all of the people in your life individually using the love language they need in order to feel loved and emotionally fulfilled. See, I am words of affirmation kind of gal. I need to hear things in order to feel loved. Tell me I am beautiful, smart, kind, you love me… and boom. I feel loved. If I am involved with someone and they don’t speak my love language to me? That shit ain’t going anywhere and fast. Since my love language is words of affirmation I tend to show love to others using words of affirmation. I can tell my babies all day long how lovely and perfect they are but they will not feel loved the way I do hearing all of that because they do not have the same love language as me. My daughter is a quality timer and my son is physical touch. Once I learned all of this I found out how to cater my love to them individually to give them the love they need in order to feel loved completely by me. Now this brilliance doesn’t stop working with our children. Nope. This essential knowledge can be used in friendships and romantic relationships as well. Honestly, I think every couple looking to get hitched should take a full class in love languages prior to tying the knot. Don’t you think it is crucial to know how to love your lover and don’t you want them to know how to love you right? My God. It’s essential!
So, how do you figure out what your love language is? There is a website where you can take a little quiz and figure it out. Click here and take it! I figured mine out on my own by reflecting and observing how exactly I show love to my kids and significant others. Do you always find little somethings that remind you of people and gift to them as a token of your love? Your love language is gift giving. Does sitting in a room with your loved one laying on the couch reading a book feed your soul? You are a quality timer. Do you love holding hands with your love and go out of your way to kiss them when you walk past or love resting your head on their shoulder? Your love language is physical touch. Do you always find yourself doing things for people you love? Helping them organize, hanging pictures, doing things to help them? Your love language is Acts of Service. Here’s the deal. Finding out your love language is a beautiful start. You will be able to articulate to your significant other what makes your heart go pitter patter. They will learn how to speak your love language to you, making you feel more loved and fulfilled in your relationship. But that’s just the half of it. You need to figure out what theirs is in order to love them the way they need to be loved in order to feel fulfilled. It can be easy to figure out if you know them quite well. Reflect and think about how they show you love. Are they always telling you how much they love you and how much they miss you? Your lover’s love language is words of affirmation. Once you figure that out you need to be conscious and make an effort to speak their love language to them. The results will be beautiful. You are going to freak out.